People

The divergence of planets

If you imagine our life as a universe, and people as planets – over time, different bodies approach each other, and then, on the contrary, move away. And you, literally with your own hands, see how this happens around you. How people with whom you saw a common vision and things begin to perceive differently what you do. And you come to understand that your worlds, or the universe, are changing. Everyone changes at a different speed. Is this critical?

I used to be very sad because of the thoughts that something could change, you could stop communicating with someone, someone could disappear from your life. Now there is an understanding that in most cases there are those who are “here and now”. You either become related to them and move on, or… everyone has their own path and their own universe.

Perhaps this was the perception earlier that with moving, people and contacts that were there would be lost. Because you will become useless to anyone on the one hand, and on the other – everyone will become useless to you. You will have a new circle of friends, new faces around you. Your own reality. And this is more of a plus than a minus. Because the new reality will perceive you as new. From my feed on Facebook, I see how they don’t perceive me and I see that this me is not needed by those who needed that one. And there haven’t been any major changes yet. I haven’t had a few more piercings in my other ear, tattoos, and in general, most of me still lives “behind the screen”.

I just want to live and not think about how people will perceive your appearance or your creativity. So as not to even bother with all this… that’s why I want to move…

Each evening has its own plan

Every evening, when my time comes, I have my own plan for it. That is, I plan what I will do for the next few hours. Sometimes it is posting photos on websites, sometimes repairing something. I have plans to film a video of repairing a camera and this will probably be the first video on the channel. The first video for an article. This is a laborious process, so I put it off until last. Today I restored the battery of a screwdriver. The process went well, although it was the first time. I also managed to shoot a micro-video with a tentacle for a post on the main blog and also took a few photos with it. But that’s not what this is about.

I planned these thoughts, and I’m trying to collect them. I found a person, and it almost ended with a breakdown in the spirit of “deleting Facebook” (well… you know. I have this happen to me. Or not? Oh…). But I didn’t. Because it’s pointless now. I think the best option is to develop these relationships. For many reasons “why”. It is appropriate to mention Placebo:

“Time will help you through
But it doesn’t have the time
To give you all the answers
To the never-ending why”

I can’t explain why you shouldn’t impose yourself on someone. Maybe that’s why it’s perceived as an imposition? I think so.

I don’t deserve new people with my current perception of other people. Because I think more than usual about what I can get “in the near future”. But the question should be asked differently – what can I give? And this is the main question that I can’t answer.

The other side of the question has always been that people need exactly the little that you can give – sincere interest, words of encouragement. When you are interested in what a person writes simply because you are really interested.

An eternal struggle with myself. I am learning to be a Creature. Not to make the mistakes that I would have made before, and to listen more to my inner voice.

Alcohol like a sex..

I caught myself thinking that for me, drinking with someone…stranger is like having sex with just anyone. That is, you can, but why? While promoting the topic “why doesn’t everyone sleep with everyone”, I came to the conclusion that there is no point in this. For example, you can catch some kind of disease. A person can be sloppy (in your understanding), a person can be interested “in themselves”. A person can behave in a way that we find unpleasant. It’s just that in sex there are more “animal” instincts, and then there is the very essence of alcohol as such. So, to the idea that you shouldn’t sleep with just anyone, you come to another – that, respecting yourself, you also shouldn’t drink with people you don’t…respect? Probably.

As Dasha once said – “a person is not my level”. Well, apparently, in this interpretation, it is somewhere like that.